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This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.

Trailer Truth: Prometheus, Rock of Ages, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, and Ted

I write an article at movies.com called Trailer Truth. Here are the three latest I’ve written. Give it some love, comments, tweets, Facebook affection. I never watch a trailer until after I’ve seen the movie, and I also attempt to avoid as much news as possible. Then I compare what I knew, to what you knew. Let’s find out if what we see in the trailer is what we get, and if there is any advantage to going in fresh. (There will be spoilers.)

Prometheus

What I Knew Before: I knew Prometheus was probably a prequel to Alien, but no one involved in the film really wanted to say that. Why? No clue. Avoiding trailers for this one proved difficult, especially since it seemed to be sponsoring every NBA playoff game. I saw that moment in the cave when two scientists discover the ancient drawings at least two dozen times before my finger quickly found the remote control. Here's something funny, I saw two images of Michael Fassbender from the film. The first one had me convinced he was an android. The second one made me believe I jumped to the wrong conclusion.

I watched Alien two days before I saw the screening of Prometheus. It had been a decade since I saw it. While it is very dated (technologically), Alien still packs some great scares. Most importantly it gives me one of my top three movie monsters of all time. I wanted to make sure I felt that pace again, which I remember being slower, before going into this one. CLICK HERE to read the rest of Trailer Truth: Prometheus

Rock of Ages

What I Knew Before: I knew it had something to do with a singer in a smokey room, with the smell of wine and cheap perfume. The singer in question is none other than Stacee Jaxx (technically I didn't know how to spell that name until after I saw the film). This is one of those films where I sat through the trailer twice in the theater. You may be saying to yourself, "I thought you aren't supposed to WATCH the trailers, Jeff." I didn't watch. I closed my eyes and hummed a little. Yes, I'm serious. So, this is what I knew … Stacee Jaxx had to play in a club singing '80s "hits," otherwise Alec Baldwin was doomed. Yes, I knew Jaxx was played by Tom Cruise and it was based on the Broadway play. That's it. Nothing else. CLICK HERE to read the rest of Trailer Truth: Rock of Ages 

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

What I Knew Before: One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is not the same. I think that is a song from Sesame Street, but it applies here. Our 16th President and vampires have nothing to do with each other, or do they? I knew this premise and not a whole lot more. I actually didn't know any of the actors or who directed it. I assumed this would be a young Lincoln, as in, the story before he became the Lincoln we know. I also figured there had to be a lot of tongue-in-cheek moments involving Lincoln's life and how it was secretly influences by blood suckers. For the record, I kept wanting to call this film Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer. Thanks a lot, Buffy. CLICK HERE to read the rest of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter 

Ted

What I Knew BeforeSeth MacFarlane has figured out a way to get his name in a movie that isn't Tooth Fairy (yeah, that's right, he's in that flick). All it took was getting Mark WahlbergMila Kunis and a teddy bear. I knew the furry little guy comes to life, plus it's a R-rated comedy. The only images I've seen is Wahlberg and the bear sitting on the couch together, and Kunis seeing the bear with four hookers on the couch. I got the sense that Kunis was more shocked about the sex-workers than the inanimate object being alive, so we'll assume she's in on the joke. I've always thought Wahlberg has very limited range, but his wheelhouse is pretty strong. Kunis is ridiculously fun to look at, and is also pretty good with comedy. She helped make Friends with Benefits watchable, plus she's worked with MacFarlane before as Meg on Family Guy. CLICK HERE to read the rest of Trailer Truth: Ted 

 

The Amazing Spider-Man

Trailer Truth: Snow White and the Huntsman, The Dictator, Dark Shadows