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This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.

The Twilight Saga: New Moon

new_moon_poster_--_officialQuickcard Review The Twilight Saga: New Moon

Directed by: Chris Weitz Cast: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Michael Sheen Running Time: 2 hrs 10 mins Rating: PG-13 Release Date: November 20, 2009

PLOT: Edward (Pattinson) decides he must leave Bella (Stewart) to keep her safe. Bella finds a new relationship with Jacob (Lautner), a family friend, who turns out to be a werewolf.

WHO'S IT FOR? If you're a twi-hard then you have already raced to the end of this review to see if I'm on the team that hates or loves this franchise. And the stereotype is that you are a teenage girl. Or wish you still were.

Complete coverage of The Twilight Saga: New Moon

McLaughlin’s TSR – 8/10 Allen’s TSR – 4/10 He Said – She Said … The Twilight Saga: New Moon

OVERALL

Let's get past the fan obsession. Let's get past dreamboats, and who is dating whom. Let's get past Team Edward, Team Jacob and Team Bella (like Switzerland from what I understand). Forget the swooning you'll hear in the theater. Let's get past if this is an authentic adaptation of the second novel in the "Twilight" series. Let's not pay attention to box office numbers, and whether that equals quality. We're only going to pay attention to the film and whether it's good, or bad. Can we do that people?

This is a film that hinges on two big events. Our first one is a paper cut. After Bella and Edward finally realize they can't live without each other in the first film, Bella gets a paper cut and this changes everything. Suddenly, Edward now fully understands that he and Bella shouldn't be together. Vampires and humans just don't mix. A paper cut.

This leads to an unbelievable break up that Bella believes. Time passes and there is some fun with Bella's friends. Jessica (Anna Kendrick) gives us a typical teen friend and Mike (Michael Welch) gives us a typical teen crush. Both give us an escape from the supposed romance of a lifetime. Beyond that we have Jacob slowly coming into form. Muscles abound. Shirts come off. New feelings emerge. Can you imagine how many jean shorts these guys must go through? Insane costs. Jacob's secret is that he's a big furry beast (werewolf). Bella seems shocked ... surprising for a girl who crushes on a vampire.

This leads to big event number two. In an odd crank call, confusing phone message between Edward and Jacob ... Edward now wants to head to the Volturi (an important group of vampires) and off himself. I won't get into all the details here in case you want to go in fresh. But it's a phone call.

So we've got a paper cut and a phone call ... and a romance that never feels as big as the movie tries to make it seem. There are moments, like a vampire fight in Italy, and hints of what is to come, but in its current form, we have a teenage romance that has turned into a love triangle. It's just a passion that not everyone is allowed to see, unless you dive into that first paragraph of information up above. And for most, that's not something we're willing to do. And therefore, the movies remain mild, average, and occasionally interesting.

FINAL SCORE: 5/10

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