This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.
All in Film Reviews
I say this with a smile from ear to ear, there is too much of a good thing. The Dark Knight is the best adult superhero film of all time.
This is entertainment, not a movie. And as entertainment goes, Mamma Mia! belts it out of the park.
Hellboy is it's own world. That is a compliment and also the problem. Director Guillermo del Toro has envisioned a fantastic looking world, but it's just a vision.
If you can turn off your mind, and I know that is pretty easy for most of us, then you'll get a kick out of this 3D journey.
This ensemble piece works if you know Los Angeles. After all, it's very possible for a homeless kid, pot-smoking Realtor, young model and a number of perverts to cross paths in that town.
I wanted more unearthed footage. But if you are looking for a tribute to the man, you won't find anything better.
Will Smith, Fourth of July, superhero ... it all seems to add up to a great combination. But they only made half a film.
Plot: Based on the graphic novel, The Assassins, the Fraternity is a secret society of assassins who have been killing for years. They recruit a man who looks like a nobody on the surface, Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy), but just like them, he has the ability to bend bullets. Sloan (Morgan Freeman) and Fox (Angelina Jolie) need Wesley to help take down a rogue assassin before they're all dead. Who’s It For? It's violent, there's eye candy, and most of it has to do with guns, so it's most definitely a guy movie.
Expectations: I assumed McAvoy wasn't the right fit, Freeman hasn't made a good film in a while, and Jolie ... yeah, she's still got it. The previews gave me a hint of The Matrix and Fight Club and that's
Plot: Wall*E (short for Waste Allocation Load Lifter Earth-Class) is a robot stuck on what is left of Earth. It's a garbage planet and has been for nearly 700 years. His life suddenly takes a shift from beyond collecting junk when Eve, another robot, makes a trip to the planet. Suddenly Wall*E finds himself trying to save Earth, humanity and the love of his life. Who’s It For? It doesn't matter who you are, Wall*E is for everyone. The one thing you have to make sure of is that you can appreciate the concept of a musical. There are no song and dance numbers performed per se, but an ongoing theme does include Hello Dolly.
Expectations: Hmm... Short Circuit and a little E.T. in outer space didn't seem like much. Plus, I
Plot: Deepak Chopra, looks like you have company. Guru Pitka (Mike Myers) is the love guru and needs to work his magic on hockey all-star Darren Roanke (Romany Malco), but he also falls for the team owner, Jane Bullard (Jessica Alba). Who’s It For? It's a lowbrow comedy with many jokes consisting of a play on words, or someone getting punched in the nuts. Myers isn't a guarantee any more and he is most certainly front and center in this film.
Expectations: My favorite Myers film is still So I Married an Axe Murderer? with Austin Powers being a close second. Those films seem a long way off and Myers' charm has faded. I assumed I
Plot: A science teacher (Mark Wahlberg) and his wife (Zooey Deschanel) leave Philadelphia and go on the run from an apocalyptic crisis that is killing everyone in its path, making its way through the Northeast. Who’s It For? If you are a die-hard M. Night Shyamalan fan, then no matter what I say, you’re seeing this flick. Even though this is a horror film, and there are some disturbing images, most of the violence and gore is left to the imagination.
Expectations: I was hoping. That’s all I could muster for M. after Lady in the Water and The Village.
SCORECARD (1-10)
Actors: Mark Wahlberg as Elliot Moore: It just didn’t fit. Elliot is a
Plot: Bruce Banner (Edward Norton) is back and along with him is his angry green giant that lurches within. Bruce is on the run from the military who want to harvest him as a weapon, while all he wants to do is get rid of the beast. Who’s It For? Comic book fans should be a little more inclined with this version of Hulk compared with Ang Lee's 2003 adaptation. But ladies, the romance doesn't work, so if that's your only reason for going, you can stay at home.
Expectations: I love Norton. He's easily in my top 5 right now. But saying that, Hulk is a tough sell because of the CGI factor. Plus, rumors swirled about Norton refusing to do press for the film because they wouldn't agree to 10
In BrugesDirected by: Martin McDonagh Cast: Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson, Ralph Fiennes Time: 1 hr 47 mins Rating: R
Plot: When a targeted kill goes wrong and leads to an accidental death, a hitman (Farrell) and his partner (Gleeson) have to lie low in Bruges, Belgium.
Who’s It For? There's definitely some violence, but it is mainly the matter-of-fact conversations from Farrell that will have people talking.
Expectations: There was a strong buzz for this film, yet this was McDonagh's first feature film, so you never know. Plus, Farrell is either on or off, there's no in between.
SCORECARD (1-10)
Actors: Colin Farrell as Ray: Farrell is "on" with this role. He's able to be carry around some terrible stereotypes and be likeable. Farrell can act, as Tigerland, Cassandra's Dream, Minority Report and now In Bruges have proved, it's
“21″ is a film about six MIT students learning how to count cards and then take down Vegas for millions at blackjack. The one thing you need for that is massive intelligence, yet that is the characteristic most absent from this film. It’s based on the true story and book “Bringing Down the House” and goes beyond the old standby that says the book is always better than the film. Changes were made, the least of which was making the main character white instead of Asian. Ben Campbell (Jim Sturgess) is an MIT student struggling for money. He needs $300,000 for medical school, yet never once considers a student loan. He’s also never heard of blackjack, which almost makes less sense.
Professor Micky (Kevin Spacey) tries to recruit Ben into the card counting club, but he resists until Jill (Kate Bosworth) flirts a little.
You don’t sit down to a Britney Spears’ concert to hear great opera. That has to be the mind-set when you walk into the theater for “Never Back Down,” a story of an angry kid finding mixed martial arts and trying to turn his life around. First of all, I’m a fan of “The Karate Kid,” all of the “Rocky” flicks (except No. 5), “Diggstown” and even “Gladiator” (not the Oscar winner). That said, I still wasn’t expecting much of “Never Back Down.”
But here’s what I hoped for: someone to root for, someone to root against, an inspiring coach, some eye candy and, of course, some training montages.
For the most part, I got what I wanted.
Inspired by the true story of a 1971 London bank heist that goes terribly wrong, “The Bank Job” has it all: corruption, sex scandals, political intrigue, murder. Despite all of those wonderfully evil things, the film never takes off.
Jason Statham stars as Terry, a car dealer barely making ends meet. Martine (Saffron Burrows), a friend from the old neighborhood, brings Terry a foolproof plan to rob a bank. Terry is torn because he has a family, but the need to provide a better life leads him to get the old gang back together and pull off this “sure-fire” heist.
But as we all know, no bank heist is easy. Martine has some secrets up her sleeve, plus the royal family — and every criminal and politician in London, or so it seems — has something valuable within the targeted vault.
The problem with “The Bank Job” is that it’s not really about the bank job. As it turns out, the actual robbery is easy — it’s what comes after that’s intriguing. But the film takes way too long to get to the dirty, intense aftermath.
Disheveled and worn down, Miss Pettigrew (Frances McDormand) goes from bad to worse. Before the opening credits of “Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day” are finished, she gets fired from her job as a nanny, loses all of her possessions and can’t find a bite to eat.
Set in 1939 London, just as World War II is about to break out, Miss Pettigrew must try and make a go of it. What follows is an infectious comedy that becomes a wonderful drama.
Miss Pettigrew steals an employment assignment from her old boss and ends up at a penthouse attempting to become the “social secretary” for actress/singer Delysia Lafosse (Amy Adams).
Immediately, we are bounced from one social gathering or high-society problem to another, mainly circling around Delysia’s multiple men.
First we meet Phil (Tom Payne), whom Delysia is trying to seduce in order to secure the lead in a play. Then there’s Nick (Mark Strong), the intimidating nightclub owner Delysia lives with and sings for. Lastly, we encounter sweet Michael (Lee Pace from “Pushing Daisies”), her devoted pianist.
Narrative Review In the first few minutes of the film, I want to pull Charlie aside and have a heart to heart. I want to explain to him he doesn't have to try so hard, and being popular really shouldn't be that important. But then we wouldn't have a movie now would we? "Charlie Bartlett" is an earnest attempt to tackle the glaring problem of over-medicating today's kids. Unfortunately, a genuine debate is never created, and our lead character isn't really that charming. Charlie (Anton Yelchin) is an optimist who dreams of being the popular kid. After getting kicked out of every prep school imaginable, he moves back home with his drunk mother (Hope Davis) and attends Western Summit High School, a public school run by a principal (Robert
Narrative ReviewThe romantic comedy is a difficult beast to tame. Love Actually made it look easy; other films, such as 27 Dresses seem to run out of material too quickly. Definitely, Maybe takes a crack at getting some laughs, some tears and a little romance -- and it works. Definitely. Will (Ryan Reynolds) attempts to explain his past relationships and impending divorce to his 11-year-old daughter, Maya (Abigail Breslin), with a twist -- he changes the names of his romantic partners and won't tell her which woman is her mother.
This sounds like a knock-off of the TV show "How I Met Your Mother," but quality performances across the board make this
Narrative ReviewWhen you hear the name Vince Vaughn, you expect laughter. That seems to be the rule now. Sure, for a while he attempted drama with a "Psycho" remake, "Clay Pigeons" and "Return to Paradise," but the public spoke with their wallets. None of those films made much money, and Vaughn returned to comedy with huge hits such as "Wedding Crashers." So who better than Vaughn to lead us through 30 cities in 30 days with four stand-up comedians? "Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show: 30 Days and 30 Nights, Hollywood to the Heartland" is supposed to be a raucous ride of laughter, but it's thin on one important aspect: the jokes. Vaughn is joined by four stand-up comedians (Ahmed Ahmed, John Caparulo, Bret Ernst and Sebastian Maniscalco)