From Paris with Love

Directed by: Pierre Morel Cast: Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, John Travolta Running Time: 1 hr 30 mins Rating: R Release Date: February 5, 2010

PLOT: A wannabe spy (Rhys-Meyers) works with an over-the-top Special Ops agent (Travolta) to stop a terrorism plot in Paris that also involves cocaine distribution.

WHO'S IT FOR?: Action movie fans will get to see explosions and shootings. The John Travolta sadist will enjoy watching him crash and burn in another awkward, if not embarrassing character.

EXPECTATIONS: This is from the director of Taken, so it's very likely this will have complicated action scenes. But will they be too orchestrated to be exciting? The title of the film also makes me curious about any connection with the James Bond film, From Russia with Love.

SCORECARD (0-10)

ACTORS:

Jonathan Rhys-Meyers as James Reece: From Paris with Love considers this pretty-boy character to be naïve because he thinks before he shoots. The bumbling Reece constantly breaks up the “rhythm” of Wax’s destruction by whining about (gasp!) logic. Even as the unlikely hero, Reece is too frustratingly inept to root for. Rhys-Meyers is also embarrassingly unconvincing as either a love interest or a budding super-spy. When all of this is added together, it makes one consider the idea that maybe Reece is the movie’s true bad guy. Score: 2

John Travolta as Charlie Wax: Achieving a hat trick in a list of failed roles (The Taking of Pelham 123, Old Dogs and now this), Travolta suits up in Wild Hogs-like clothes to play a sassy idiot who rampages through Paris with an appetite for destruction. The film heaps a a disgusting amount of worship on this character (everything he does is right), and considers all of his action to be the product of a super-badass, when it’s actually performed by a clown. If anything, he’s a disturbing suggestion of what the American action hero can sometimes transform into over time, if our serious amusement with such characters should continue. Wax’s ridiculousness goes hand in hand with the film, and that is not an excuse by any means. Score: 3

TALKING: Reece's temporary drug-filled state of mind clouds up the only moment when Wax explains to him (and the audience) how any of these sporadic plot elements could make any sense. Desperate to be cool, Wax fires off dud after dud when it comes to dialogue. “Yeaa boyyy” should be outlawed from screenwriting, and a brief nod to his famous “royale with cheese” line from Pulp Fiction can be chalked up as pitiful. Score: 4

SIGHTS: Yes, this was indeed shot in Paris. As for the action, some of it is captured in slow motion that is meant to “glorify” the “awesomeness” of Wax’s moments of hand-to-hand combat. This decision works in other action films before From Paris with Love, but only because their fighting choreography is actually impressive. Score: 4

SOUNDS: In a cheap comedic moment, the hard-shelled Wax sings along to Burt Bacharach’s “Close To You”, a winking contrast to the ear drum-exploding gunshots heard throughout the movie. (My sound designer colleague told me afterward that Travolta's guns are purposely louder than anyone else's, something I cannot verify but am curious about). Score: 5

PLOT SPOILERS

BEST SCENE: A car chase has the adrenaline the movie had been missing all along. For the first time, things actually feel at stake as opposed to carefully plotted out.

ENDING: The omnipotent idiocy of this movie is parodied by its conclusion which has “our heroes” playing chess.

QUESTIONS: So ... the drugs were related to terrorism because ... because ... what?

REWATCHABILITY: Jeff Bayer is trying to sell me the idea that this movie can be enjoyed just like all of the awesomely awful Seagal films I hold dear in my heart. Perhaps when this movie comes out on DVD/Blu-ray I will give this theory a test run.

OVERALL

Gun battles are piled on top of each other, the plot is thinner than a line of coke, and a clumsy spy who thinks with his head is condemned for not thinking with his pistol. A bald John Travolta runs around with a killing instinct that would make Jack Bauer shake his head, and barks cuss words because it makes him sound tougher. Were From Paris with Love not trying so hard in every aspect, going from one phony action sequence to the next, a few of these ingredients might register some affection from audiences that should be used to this kind of stuff. Working with a story idea by Luc Besson, director Pierre Morel and Co. have gone over the top, only to smash into a million pieces once they hit the pavement. This exceeds the fun of his previous Taken, and the parkour-filled District B13 is now becoming a sad memory. If this is a duel against American audiences to appease their entertainment expectations, From Paris with Love is like bringing a rocket launcher to a gunfight.

FINAL SCORE: 3/10