I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell Directed by: Bob Gosse Cast: Matt Czuchry, Geoff Stults, Jesse Bradford Running Time: 1 hr 45 mins Rating: R Release Date: September 25, 2009

Plot: A social master (Czuchry) brings his recently cheated-on friend (Bradford) and their soon to be engaged buddy (Stults) on a night of misadventures they might never forget. Based on the book of the same title written by Tucker Max.

Who’s It For? The college crowd who want to re-experience the only book they’ve ever read outside of class.

Expectations: The tales I had previously heard about Tucker Max were impressive only in the way that they constantly seemed to dig deeper and deeper into moral disregard. Going into this film, I had not read the book beforehand.

SCORECARD (0-10)

Actors: Matt Czuchry as Tucker Max: The relatively unknown actor prevails in presenting the character of Tucker Max, regardless of how despicable the "character" may be. His embodiment is very smooth, every wink and line of self appreciation seems to have come from Czuchry, not his mirror pal Max. My hatred for all things that Tucker Max believes in has never been more crystal clear - I have a believable performance from Czuchry to thank for that. Score: 6

Geoff Stults as Dan: This incredibly plain character is what I imagine some fraction of this movie's male demographic has to resemble ... college-boys with looks sculpted by an Abercrombie and Fitch catalogue with some blonde arm candy to boot. That being said, it may or may not be a coincidence that Dan is the person weakest to Tucker’s charm (even women don't give into him that easily). Score: 3

Jesse Bradford as Drew: Turned into a zombie that spews cynical remarks after his girlfriend cheats on him, Drew's consistently dark chime-ins begin at annoying, turn towards amusing, and end up ultimately at desperate screenwriting. Bradford has a good dry delivery of the cynicism that constantly spews from Drew's mouth, and sure, Bradford has the looks to realize an attractive Trekkie, but the character is as much an exaggeration as the "Halo"-dominating stripper he falls in love with in just one night. Score: 4

Talking: Tucker Max's friends quote Tucker Max a couple of times. As if that wasn't narcissistic enough, Tucker turns two drinking cheers into self honoring prose - twice. How are we supposed to think this guy is worthy of alcohol in hell, again? Score: 3

Sights: Rapper Paul Wall has a cameo as an amusing (and sadly similar) faux crunk-hop artist named "Grillionaire." Those who are expecting a grandiose version of Tucker Max should aim their visual expectations towards straight to DVD quality. The real Tucker Max has an extended cameo as Dan's on-screen brother, but only has a few lines. But more appalling than Max's acting, (which at least he admitted to), on-screen Tucker tries to "court" many women, but is seen doing the deed only twice. What's up with that, Broseph Stalin? Score: 4

Sounds: Not so recognizable alternative groups like The Coup and Louis XIV are heard in a soundtrack obviously compiled on a tight budget. But Hell gets lucky when Louis XIV's lyrics (on a track called "Louis XIV") are able speak so much about Tucker Max in just one line: "Me, me, me, me, me, is all I ever want to talk about." Score: 5

OVERALL

It doesn’t matter if this self-worshiping text is adapted from a book that p*sses off the roof of the NY Bestseller List. Its adapted script is conceived with too much frat fantasy, filled with boyish dreams of midget strippers, pushover fiancees, and intelligent “exotic strippers” that are awesome at “Halo.” As much as one might wish he didn’t exist, Tucker Max, the Superman of male arrogance is the only believable element in a movie where even the side-dudes aren't recognizable. Worse than this movie's attempt at supplying jokes outside of the bro-zone are its poor balancing skills, which tends to drop characters off the face of the earth when not trying to teach them a lesson.

The film's concept of learning a lesson seems to bounce off the ego of Tucker, who appears resilient to most tiers of morality. Surprisingly, his actions are met by a somewhat disapproving tone from the story. Is it possible that Max's own movie doesn't agree with the backstabbing, selfish ways of living his life? Or, is it more likely that the film is too stupid to realize this?

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell realizes my worst fears of the male persona, with a “protagonist” that grins his way through every scene while trying to charm the pants off women by bullying them (their loathing is actually a form of attention). But it's important to remember to not give him negative energy of which he could feed on - you just have to brush him off.

How did a spectacularly disgraceful reckless and narcissistic bro-dude become an iconic figure to the college party culture? Beats the hell out of me, but there's no way you'll find the answer here.

Final Score: 4/10