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This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.

The Limits of Control

Limits of Control Directed by: Jim Jarmusch Cast: Isaach De Bankolé, Paz de la Huerta, Gael García Bernal, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Bill Murray Running Time: 1 hr 55 mins Rating: R Release Date: May 15, 2009

Plot:This story is of a mysterious loner (De Bankolé), who works outside of the law, this time in Spain. He takes care of problems for people, without talking too much.

Who’s It For?Are you the world's biggest Jarmusch fan? That's it, that's the list of people who should see this, unless you also like to test your patience.

Expectations:I liked Jarmusch's Coffee and Cigarettes. I was let down by the ending of Broken Flowers. So I was suspicious heading into this film. But hey, when you throw in Bernal, Swinton and Murray, how bad could it be? Cough. Cough.

SCORECARD (0-10)

Actors: Isaach De Bankolé as Lone Man: He wants two espresso's, not a double espresso. Which is funny because my old boss also had trouble ordering these drinks. The key word is separate. As you know by now, I'm a fan of characters who are the smartest guys in the room. Plus, this guy doesn't drink or have sex when he's on the job, so you know he's focused. You know what else? He walks. And does voga. An absolute obscene amount of both. I do think he's primed to be a James Bond villain after this though. Score: 4

Paz de la Huerta as Nude: Why's it rated-R you ask? Look no further than Nude. She's naked. The see-through rain jacket is a nice touch, but otherwise she's just another element that confuses. And you'll have plenty of time to realize she's got two boobs, but they aren't teammates (they are pointing in opposite directions). Score: 3

Swinton/Hurt/Bernal/Murray as Blonde/Guitar/Mexican/American: Yes, they are all getting lumped together. Mainly because if you add up their combined screen time you've probably got 8 minutes ... maybe. They all swoop in, say something obscure, and then are gone. Only one of them is killed on screen. It should have been all four. Score: 1

Talking: Jarmusch also wrote the script. You don't speak spanish, right? But guess what, if you like that line you'll get to hear it 17 times! Otherwise, molecules, film, art and bohemians get discusses in one-sided monologues ... and no, nothing interesting about it. Score: 1

Sights:Spain looks absolutley great. And I liked the Lone Man's suits. But it really got me to thinking, he's just got to have hideous body odor right? I mean, he has two suits. And we never see him shower (yet we see every other minute of his life). I know some countries in Europe embrace the B.O. and if that's the case, then the Lone Man may just be king. Score: 5

Sounds: The score is a series of hypnotic notes that eventually find a rhythm. Bottom line is, it doesn't wake you up, and that's what you need with Limits of Control. Score: 3

PLOT SPOILERS

Best Scene: When the Lone Man looks at a hidden mansion of sorts, and there are men with guns everywhere, I thought it finally forced the movie into an action corner ... I was wrong.

Ending: Did you see the ending of Broken Flowers and feel left unsatisfied. Get ready for more!

Questions: How many almonds could the Lone Man fit up his nostrils? I know the question seems pointless, but your mind will wonder, and that's where I found mine. Also, is he gellin'? cause he walks a lot, and his feet have got to be killing him.

Rewatchability: I seriously would watch Disaster Moive before sitting through Limits of Control again. That is sad, but true. And there is no way in hell anyone is giving this movie their full attention on DVD. It offers too many chances to do laundry, make dinner, or take a nap.

OVERALL

I once saw an exhibit at an art museum that was a separate room where the noise and light would increase until you couldn't take it anymore. I tell you this because that's what this movie felt like. It was a challenge not to get up and leave. But the most annoying part is De Bankolé is cool enough to where one tiny ounce of you is curious if anything will happen. I'm here to tell you nothing happens. Testing your Patience ... sorry, I mean Limits of Control may just be created for those who hate modern films. Guy Ritchie would turn this into a three-minute film, taking all of the good stuff. Jarmusch is absolutely allowed to keep exploring new ways to tell almost non-stories. But I can keep hoping he gets around to saying something worthwhile. Final Score: 2/10

Goodbye Solo

Scott Walker