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My Bloody Valentine 3-D

My Bloody Valentine 3D Directed by: Patrick Lussier Cast: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith Running Time: 1 hr 40 mins Rating: R

Plot: The town of Harmony, Pennsylvania is terrorized by a gas-mask wearing killer named Harry who has returned on the ten-year anniversary of his original massacre.

Who’s It For? The advertisements have it right when selling this as a date movie. But let it be known that this isn't your parent's slasher flick. Also, this is a near must-see for horror fans, as they could debate whether this is one of the more successful slasher flicks in years.

Expectations: From the start, this movie looked like a horror movie with a fun gimmick that in the end could save or financially finish off the flop-prone distributor Lionsgate. Would the usage of 3-D really add to a likely formulaic experience?



Jensen Ackles as Tom Hanniger: Ackles is a bit too chiseled to be the weird guy in town. At times, he plays "crazy" with a bit too much ham. Score: 4

Jaime King as Sarah Palmer: This horror film grants us with decent acting, and King is a good example. Like her on-screen peers, she can tend to overact. But King buoys well as a survivor haunted by Harry in the past and present. She was in The Spirit, but is comparatively far from lifeless as screaming redhead Sarah. Score: 6

Kerr Smith as Axel Palmer: Smith has the goofy edge of a Leonardo DiCaprio wannabe. He's scruffy like Leo too, but can barely be taken as serious. As sheriff of Harmony, he reminded me a bit of when Josh Hartnett had the same job in 30 Days of Night, with the same awkwardness for such a position. Score: 3

Talking: Dialogue is only important in most horror movies when it is bad. Thankfully, there's nothing really to report here. It's obvious horror screenwriting is more about the action than the talking, but here the latter is not completely forgotten about. It is instead fulfilled so that it does not extract from the film's more important aspects. Score: 5

Sights: There's a lot of fun to be had with My Bloody Valentine but it's even more intense when its brutality gets in your face with 3-D. If you're going to take this "3-D ride into hell," paying the few extra bucks for the 3-D is a wiser decision. The film's guts of glory can be appreciated at their highest extent when they seem to fly out at you, or when Harry's pickaxe seems aimed directly for your forehead. My Bloody Valentine is great fun, and the 3-D helps make it so. Score: 9

Sounds: There's bare usage of the "orchestra crash," the kind of sound used in "jump scenes." The terror of Valentine is a bit more genuine because it's not completely given away by its score. This is definitely not a cheap scare-fest that characterizes many modern PG-13 horror movies. Score: 5


Best Scene: The introduction of the carnage that is My Bloody Valentine is pretty impressive, but it's hard to mark it as the peak of the film's brutality. There are many moments that are almost as horrifying and exciting.

Ending: Let's just say that mainstream horror films are more prone for open conclusions, and in that respect Valentine sticks with its peers.

Questions: Would this entire experience be equally as exciting without the (literally) eye-popping 3-D?

Rewatchability: The bloody fun of Valentine is one that can be shared with curious friends (or dates, even). However, the shock-factor crucial to the film probably depletes with continuous views.


The film's main goal of providing genuine horror entertainment is helped by its fulfilling amount of gory/scary moments. All of this is then accelerated by 3-D, which is a must if seeing this film at all.

My Bloody Valentine is not without some cliches and dumb moments, but there are enough thrills and surprises to separate it from the horror movies of the past that have candy-heart size fun.

Final Score: 7/10

Box Office Review - January 19, 2009