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This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

Plot: The four-pack of superheroes encounter the insanely powerful Silver Surfer, but unfortunately, meeting him means the world coming to an end. The misunderstood Silver Surfer leaves a path of destruction wherever he goes. Reed, Sue, Johnny and Ben try to work with the government to put a stop to the Silver Surfer, but things get complicated when Dr. Doom makes a comeback. All of this, plus Reed and Sue are trying to get married. Who’s it for: Fans of the first and kids. The “FF” films just don’t pack the punch of the other superhero films like “Batman Begins,” and don’t have the humor of “The Incredibles.”

Expectations: I was very surprised they were making a second film. But then I did have that glimmer of hope … maybe they would make Dr. Doom dark and nasty, maybe the Silver Surfer could save the movie … maybe.

SCORECARD

Actors: Ioan Gruffudd as Reed Richards: Is there a more unlikely couple than Gruffudd and Alba? What’s even more amazing is, Reed takes advantage of Sue at times in the movie. In real life, he would be worshipping every second he gets. And unfortunately it seems whatever the special effects budget was, it wasn’t spent on the elasticity of Reed. Grade: 3

Jessica Alba as Sue Storm: Well, they found a way for her to look bad. Apparently all they needed was a couple of extra pounds of makeup. Grade: 4

Chris Evans as Johnny Storm: The most interesting part of the film was Johnny’s ability to swap powers with anyone. Unfortunately, Johnny is still an over-the-top egocentric, who never really has anything funny to say. Grade: 5

Talking: It’s never a good sign for a film when, close to the end, one of the characters recaps the entire movie to make sure the audience understands where they are at. And the first 30 minutes plays out like a lame sitcom that wouldn’t survive the CW. Plus, there are lines like this one from Ben (Michael Chiklis), “My lips are sealed, at least they would be if I had any.” Please tell me you just groaned when you read that line. Grade: 3

OVERALL

When Jessica Alba was at the MTV Movie Awards she called “Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer” the best family/comedy of the summer. That alone should spell disaster for a superhero film. Really, it’s just more of the original — the actors don’t have chemistry, Dr. Doom isn’t doomish enough and the special effects don’t put it in with the elite films of the genre. The Silver Surfer could have been a savior to this “franchise” but he was terribly underwritten and apparently never had freewill until meeting Storm. Not even giving him the voice of Morpheus (Laurence Fishburne) could make him interesting. Alba did have one aspect of the family/comedy correct, they all hugged at the end.

Overall Grade: 3

Nancy Drew

Emma Roberts from Nancy Drew