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This is Jeff Bayer, and I don't update this site very often. If you'd like to listen to my current movie podcast you can find it at MovieBS.com.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

X-Men Origins: Wolverine Directed by: Gavin Hood Cast: Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber, Danny Huston, Lynn Collins, Will i Am, Ryan Reynolds, Taylor Kitsch Time: 2 hrs, 2 minutes Rating: PG-13 Release Date: May 1, 2009

Plot: After the death of his girlfriend, Wolverine (Jackman) is hell bent on revenge, which brings him face to face with his life long friend, Sabertooth (Schreiber). But before they battle, he's brought into the mutant Weapon X program.

Who’s It For?: X-Men is huge, so this will draw a crowd. But here's the thing, if you're fine with Spider-Man 3, or X-Men United ... then you'll see anything with super powers and be happy. But don't go expecting more with this film.

Expectations: 20th Century Fox acted like the world came to an end when a leaked, almost finished copy of Wolverine hit the web. It won't slow down box office sales, but you know what? Nobody said it was amazing. And I just kept thinking I already knew the story about how Logan became Wolverine.

SCORECARD (0-10)

Actors:

Hugh Jackman as Logan/Wolverine: Sure, Wolverine is the most interesting character in first three X-Men movies. Didn't we already know his backstory though? They did flashbacks to try and fill in the blanks in those films, and I don't know how I felt like I needed the full complete story. Also, with Jackman front and center the entire film, you start to realize Wolverine has the claws, but otherwise he's just a nice guy here. He's not as gruff as he is when it comes to X-Men. Score: 6

Liev Schreiber as Victor/Sabertooth: I really couldn't figure out his motivation. Schreiber tries to sell lines like this ... "I'm not afraid of dying." And Schreiber's retort, "How do you know, you've never tried it." He's big, but not intimidating, and the black trench coat isn't helping either. Score: 4

Danny Huston as William Stryker: We get it, Huston looks evil. Got anything else? Cause it seems like there are plenty of reasons you could kill this guy, and since he's not a mutant, what's stopping you? Brian Cox left big shoes to fill, and Huston doesn't do it. Score: 4

Lynn Collins as Kayla Silverfox: Love schmove. I never felt this romantic connection throughout the entire movie, and felt this whole storyline just slowed down the movie. Though she looks familiar, I didn't recognize her from The Number 23 and The Lake House. Score: 3

Taylor Kitsch as Remy LeBeau/Gambit: Here's the highlight of the film, and just so you know he's only around for 10 minutes. Sure the accent isn't always there, but Kitsch should have been starring in X-Men Origins: Gambit, before this movie came out. At least it would have given us something new. Score: 7

Will I Am as John Wraith and Ryan Reynolds as Wade Wilson/Deadpool: I'm putting these two together cause neither one should have been in this film. Will I Am struggled in the acting department. And just when I thought we were leaving him behind, he says, "Wait, I'm coming with you." All I could think was NO! And that's the same thought I had with wasting Reynolds in this role. He's in the film for maybe six minutes. Some studio exec must have said to him ... "You do this film, and we'll set you up with Sandra Bullock in a romantic-comedy." Wait, that's not a good idea either. Score: 2

Talking: It's stale. I can't remember laughing, so they failed with all those supposed catchy one-liners. If you want to play a game while you watch, see how many lines Jackman delivers with his brow furrowed. Score: 4

Sights Do you like seeing the claws? You'll get your chance time and time again. That's really the best (obviously) part of X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Score: 7

Sounds: Completely forgettable. The score doesn't help with the one thing this film tries to cram down your throat: emotional, heartfelt love/compassion. Score: 4

PLOT SPOILERS

Best Scene: Remember those killer opening credits with Watchmen? Not happening, but it's not for the lack of effort. Logan and Victor run through every war, which is supposed to explain who they are as people. It's just not effective. The best scene is when he get to see all of Gambit's powers.

Ending: If you know the basic story of Wolverine, you kind of know how it will end, I just had no clue that bullets would do that. Did you? And as always, make sure your butt stays in its seat until the very last credit rolls. There are different endings that will be played, so I won't spoil the one that I saw.

Questions: Victor and Wolverine spend hundreds of years together, and then they are mortal enemies? The Blob (Kevin Durand) luckily was just sitting on a boatload of information. Man, that's convenient, huh? And here's a script rant ... So a trucker is blocking two lanes of traffic, and then immediately gets upset with Logan for wanting him to move? Just listen to the dialogue in this scene. There is no ounce of believability, and it's just a stupid way to show that Kayla has abilities. That one scene sums up the problems of the script perfectly. I'm also surprised they didn't attempt to end this film where the original X-Men movie begins.

More importantly ... What about the final fight versus Deadpool? Stryker actually has to type "engage" and other commands? That's how you decided to show the supposed perfect weapon? Really?

Rewatchability: This is the type of film I just move on from, and never make serious plans to see again.

OVERALL

If this was a great movie, I would simply be excited we got a hint of Gambit and Wade Wilson thrown in. But the problem is, they seem more interesting than what we are given with Wolverine. A failed romance is just one reason this is a flat, sloppy film ... but still, Wolverine and those claws, give us just enough action to keep us mildly interested. Final Score: 5/10

Box Office Review - May 3, 2009 - X-Men Origins: Wolverine WINS

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